Professional footballers who are well past their best are suddenly choosing to move to clubs in China rather than see out their playing days in Donald Trump’s America, it has emerged.
Trump’s anti-immigration rhetoric has scared European and South American footballers into believing they will be accused of stealing American footballer’s jobs, despite the fact that American footballers are rubbish and the MLS is worthless without imported talent.
Former Chelsea star, Oscar, said: “It was a tough choice, but in the end I had to go to the country that’s not building a wall to keep people from my continent out.
“So I’m going instead to the country that will deny me my basic human rights, such as democracy and freedom of expression, and impose limits on my communication through social media, all whilst ramming state propaganda down my throat through their national press.”
He added: “At the end of the day it can’t be any worse than playing under Mourinho and Abramovich. And they’re paying me a sh*t load of money, so what the hell!”